The weekly perspective
One question to ask yourself
What is the motive of this behaviour?
Journal on this - all of our behaviours have motive. The ones we love, the ones we hate, the ones we just can't shake. We need to figure out what this behaviour is giving us physically, spiritually, or emotionally in order to move through it.
Something to consider
"We live well enough to have the luxury to get ourselves sick with purely social, psychological stress" - Robert Sapolsky
I had an anxious weekend, it happens and it's not a big deal (not invalidating my feelings, just not catastrophosing them either), and whilst I was working my way through it, I was reminded of the work of Robert Sapolsky. This quote plays on the Buddhist idea that pain is inevitable, suffering is a choice. Without invalidating your own feelings and lived experience, I wonder if you can journal on this - where are your stressors and pains and how many of them are your reactions and stories, instead of your reality?
One thing I'd tell my younger self.
Other women aren't the problem - building each other up leads to collective success for you all. Your space isn't finite
"What are the successful women like that you know - are they supportive or is it mean girls?". I'm paraphrasing a question I got asked on my trip to Loughborough by one of the first year students after I spoke of my career. It was amazing how wholeheartedly honest I could be when I shared just how incredible the women I knew were. Honestly, all of the women in my life that I associate with, I find inspirational for their love, minds and hearts. It was a bit funny that I'd answered that, only to be trolled by another woman (kinda ruthlessly) only days later. But regardless, I wish when I was younger I hadn't spent so much time comparing and competing with other women, and assuming they didn't like me. Instead, bigging them up and pushing them to be their best. We're all in this high school musical together. There is enough space for us all.
One thing to try this week
Open up to criticism and feedback (instead of shying away)
If we revisit said troll comments, I'd like to tell you what I did. After at least 3 comments that neither encouraged open discussion nor offered helpful insight upon which I could reflect, I directly contacted the person leaving the comments with an open message. A polite request asking for feedback, for opinion, an open discussion as to where they felt I could improve in my work. It wasn't passive aggressive or killing with kindness, rather, I want the opinion of others I invite into the arena, so that I can choose to change, consider or let go. I'm naturally pretty defensive, so when I get unsolicited feedback or comments about my behaviour I turn into a bit of an ass. But I don't like that about myself. I wonder if you're the same? If so, notice where your defensiveness comes up this week and instead of shying away, lean into the trigger and get curious.
A few things to tell you...
The next intake of binge breakthrough is starting on 26th February. Spaces will probably only go to those on the waitlist (which isn't the same as this email list). Get on the waitlist now if you're even considering it.
I was a guest on The Forbidden Topics podcast with Tori and we delved deep into sex, body image and sex accelerators and breaks - I loved this chat and I know you will too. Listen here
Do you have a healthy relationship with exercise, truly? Why does no one talk about endometriosis? What can you do to support yourself? Find out here.
Do we associate with the wrong people? How can we manage PCOS fat loss? Find out here.
How can you avoid the perfectionist trap and finally feel good enough? Listen here.
One more thing...
Please share your favourite stuff.
Thank you all for continuing to share your favourite Monday email quotes. I see them all. I know how much I love seeing impactful quotes from strangers, so it means a lot that you allow me to hopefully be that person for someone else. f there's something you really relate to or know someone who'd benefit from something in this email, please share it and pay it forward. Words are magical, and if I've learned anything from writing these emails to you for years, you never know when someone needs to hear the exact thing you've got to say.
