The weekly perspective
One question to ask yourself
Is my routine helping or hindering me?
A lack of routine is a breeding ground for procrastination. It's easier to hid behind dysregulation (see Friday's e-mail), 'self-sabotage' and other pathologies. Maybe these are true. Maybe, you can look to the most obvious place. Is your routine setting you up for success? What small change can you make today, and every day this week, to support yourself?
Example. I found myself reaching for my phone straight after I meditated in the morning recently, then wondered why I was chasing that dopamine hit for the rest of the day. A micro change in my routine, not checking messages until I was outside and moving my body, allowed me to be infinitely more productive later in the day by checking my phone infinitely less. What will you do?
Something to consider
"Loneliness is a sign you are in desperate need of yourself” - Rupi Kaur
If you're struggling with feelings of disconnection or loneliness, I wonder if you can consider, what did I do this weekend to come home to myself? How did I show up for myself? Did I show up around others authentically? Did I make space to be with myself, as I am? Or was my weekend filled with 'shoulds', others' needs and wants? What will I change that will allow me to be more of myself? Was I intentional with connection with others, as myself? Journal on this.
One thing I'd tell my younger self.
Stop considering what's turning you on and start considering what's turning you off.
The part in your brain that controls sexual response is called the dual control mechanism - there are accelerators to your sex drive as well as decelerators. When I was in one of my many colourful relationships, was 15kg lighter, overworked to the bone and shockingly had the sex drive of a stone, I used to think, how can I be more turned on? How can I make myself have a sex drive? Never once considering what was turning me off - maybe then I'd have considered my body image, my body fat levels, my woeful choice in men. Maybe I'd have acted on what was stopping my sex drive (and made some better choices....) instead of blaming myself for being 'broken'.
One thing to try this week
Seek out and breathe in your daily glimmers.
You've heard of triggers (there's a warning on every other post you scroll through). But have you heard of glimmers? The opposite of triggers, glimmers are cues of safety that bring us back to calmness, feelings of safety or joy. A certain smell, your favourite song playing in the store, the butterfly landing on that tree outside - noticing these can actually help regulate our autonomic nervous system. While we’re more aware of our joy during the big life moments, it’s also up to us to look to the small moments for signs of happiness and peace. Each day this week, can your presence allow you to notice a glimmer? Tag me in them!
A few things to tell you...
ETPHD now have spaces for neurosomatics coaching and eating disorder recovery. We've been joined by Katie and Tiluka, who are both taking on clients to help you heal your relationship with food. Be one of the first to experience neurosomatics coaching in fitness. Or finally get that ED recovery support, combining the work of a Registered Dietitian and the ETPHD method. Simply reply to this email saying you'd like support - we've got you.
This one time I spoke about my business journey to this point and I put it on a podcast. Listen to it here
Did you know thinness was associated with richness? It's a really gross story. Listen to it here.
One more thing...
Please share your favourite stuff.
I'm really trying to have a more positive impact this year (it's where this Monday email spawned from). If there's something you really relate to or know someone who'd benefit from something in this email, please share it and pay it forward. Words are magical, and if I've learned anything from writing these emails to you for years, you never know when someone needs to hear the exact thing you've got to say.
