The missing piece of recovery

They were beautiful kids at a Taylor Swift day
And what ensued in Southport was truly horrifying
My thoughts are with the loved ones of everyone involved 
Whilst I fear this endemic of male violence against women
 
One of my good friends held a ‘stop the genocide’ march at the weekend,
As did many locals in Edinburgh
My thoughts are with the people of the middle east 
 
The UK has never felt safer for me as I watch (albeit with hope and optimism) the battle between Trump and Kamala Harris unfold
The reality of what it means for the states (and potentially the rest of the world) if Trump is yet again elected being all to terrifying
 
I’ve spent a lot of time visiting someone I love in hospital the past few weeks
He is one of my favourite ever people
The strongest I know
Who’s going through something more challenging than anything I’ve experienced
 
 
You’re wondering why I’m talking about this
Why I haven’t delved into bodies or boundaries or food or red flags (aside from Trump’s) 
Knowing at this point in my Friday rambles I’m usually knee deep in finding a life lesson for you in these key areas
It’s what I do after all
 
But I’ve been doing a lot of thinking the past few weeks
And whilst it’s imperative that we all take the time and dedicate the energy to working on ourselves
To find peace with ourselves and as best we can
Come back to our best selves
I’m fearful that many of us?
We’re actually too self-involved
 
We’re too lost in our own heads
Too focused on our bodies and food
Too obsessed with achieving
That we miss what’s going on around us
What’s happening in the world that we live in
That gives us a home

I definitely was
Sometimes still can be
 
The whole point of self-development and our healing journeys is so we can show up in the world more fully
Participate in real life more compassionately
Whilst for sure
Reaping the benefits of living our best, healthiest lives 
 
The problem with a lot of the current healing / wellness / fitness / podcast narratives
Is that they’re all about you in isolation
 
But the true measure of healing is your connectedness to yourself
To others
And to the world around you
 
I don’t get political
I used to say
As a mask for having no idea what was going on in the world
 
The news is too depressing
I used to declare
Whilst filling my ears with podcasts telling me how to date better or optimise my health by an iota or earn another 1% on my investments

I'd post about calories whilst a world war was being threatened
That's not my audience 
People want humour only

I'd repeat
 
Am I saying the way you date, support your health and manage your finances are irrelevant?
Absolutely not
Please spend time considering these things and supporting yourself as best you can
 
But the thing about healing your relationship with food and your body is that it clears the way to think more about the world around you
 
I imagine if you’re reading this email,
You’re one of the most compassionate, kindest, caring people I’d ever meet
It’s not that those qualities are lacking in most of us
 
Rather, the self-help narrative is one of exactly that
The self
 
It’s missing a larger part of the story
The others
The connectedness
 
When I healed my own shit
The food,
The body image,
The over-working,
The fixing,
The hyper-independence 
I say healed – some of these things are a lifelong mindful journey
I began to really care
 
More of my income went to charity
I identified more with my feminist opinions and values
I started speaking out about the abusers in my industry
Held myself accountable to my glimmers of white feminism 
Brought some awareness to collective world traumas
Because I had the space to do so  
 
Some people will remind me that it’s not my audience
Not my role in the fitness and health space to talk about genocide or abortion
I think this is a defence mechanism of many
Because they don’t have the space to acknowledge it themselves
Or because of the fear of doing so
All of which I understand
 
There is never any pressure to vocalise or share or donate or be active in bigger issues
But I wonder
How much space is taken up by thoughts of self-development and biohacking and body controlling and food managing and exercise tracking in our minds?
What does that leave for our connectedness to the world?
 
Our energy is after all, finite
 
There is space for it all in varying measures
And like I said
I encourage you to continue to support yourself as best you can
You are in this community because you care
I know that about you without you saying a word
 
I have no direct action this weekend to recommend
Nor shareable quotes for you to bank
But rather
An insight into my brain 
A brain that continues to yell from the rooftops,
Please work on your relationship with food and body
And at the same time
Remember the wider purpose of your why
 
Have a lovely weekend
I’m always here
Em

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