One question to ask yourself

What am I hiding about myself?

When you hide something about yourself, hiding parts that you feel don't fit, feel shameful, that don't allow you to 'fit' with someone else, other people, you'll always believe the connections you make are with a false version of you. This has a very clear outcome - constant feelings of insecurity and disconnection that are impossible to overcome.

Journal on this - in your key relationships, in those areas of life that mean most to you - what are you hiding about yourself?

Something to consider

When we put people on a pedestal for their body and diet choices, we will always find virtue and guilt in our own.


Stop moralising the way you, and others, eat and look.There is no hierarchy of better than. There is no way to find peace with yourself until you do this.

One thing I'd tell my younger self.

There's a type of pain in life that you want to feel. The excruciating pain of losing beautiful things: trust, people, dream opportunities. That kind of pain is the cost of living a wholehearted, courageous life.

And it's infinitely better than the pain you'll feel when you're older of not being brave enough to go for these things in the first place. I remind myself of this regularly, as I feel uncertain about new things, lose out on things I wanted. I never want to risk that feeling of abandoning myself. 

One thing to try this week

Ask someone, what do you need right now? 

I don't mean jogging up to a stranger on the street and offering to help them out with their shopping. Bur rather, the next time someone comes to you feeling stressed out, anxious, upset, be that your kid, partner, best friend, employee - instead of trying to fix it or console them, ask them, what do you need from me right now? Do you want to vent, do you want my opinion, or do you want my advice? So often we assume what people need, and it just frustrates them further, leads to disconnection. 

A few things to tell you...

When do you know if you need a diet break? What if you hate strength training, would I still recommend it as a coach? How do you know when to drop calories in a diet? We answered this and more on this weeks EIQ Nutrition podcast. 

This week, Roslyn and Bekka shared with me one of their client journeys and to say I was in awe would be an understatement. Read it here. Let yourself be inspired. I remember back in the day when our coaches started, people would wonder how I matched clients with the best coach, they wanted to work with me, they said. Now, we all see these kinds of journeys daily with the team and I'm astounded by each person who walks this wild ride with us. Most of you apply to work with a coach now, not me, and I've never been happier to be rejected...

One more thing...

Please share your favourite stuff.

I'm really trying to have a more positive impact this year (it's where this Monday email spawned from). If there's something you really relate to or know someone who'd benefit from something in this email, please share it and pay it forward. Words are magical, and if I've learned anything from writing these emails to you for years, you never know when someone needs to hear the exact thing you've got to say.